Where did fall come from?

Already October is here and I swear I am still laying on a beach somewhere in Florida soaking summer's rays. Twice now the government paused my work routine to leave me frantically trying to find peace in situations beyond

my control. I am grateful my non paid days offered more family bonding moments. After all, this seems to be what life is about. It's never about us but the people we are divinely planned to do life with. God demands my mission as mother to take every ounce of energy and resource I have. Just when I thought my teen was headed for a successful start at high school I was rudely awakened to the reality he is not mature enough yet to fit in his own dreams. Just when I thought we had our government jobs back I was laid off again, this time with a mortgage on hold. No matter how much we think we are in control we just aren't. I've resorted to hiding my face in Jesus' lap because I can't bear to see any more storms in my peace filled family fun year. My only option is to keep my toes in the sand by imagination as I stand firm in faith. God is the only one who can change hearts and transform minds. I can't put anyone back on track no matter how much I love them, not even myself. I cannot restore my finances from unexpected challenges. All I know is the Son is still shining and the best is yet to come. 

He's not an imaginary friend; He is real!

“Fear of the Lord leads to friendship, which leads to favor,” my Pastor once said. Certainly at three years-old, I didn't know this and wasn’t mature enough to grasp this concept. But in its simplest forms, I have been well aware and in AWE of God’s presence in my life from one continuous vision that comes to me during deep moments of prayer. In the first childhood dream, a man walked with me holding my left hand. He was clothed in dazzling white so bright I couldn't see much of him or know where we were. There was a cross ahead of us and He was leading me there. I woke with nothing but a assuring sense this man is my best friend. Throughout grade school, I didn't connect this man with the name of Jesus who I learned about at church, but somewhere, my soul must have sensed it. When I was 12, I was introduced to Jesus as Savior. I was attending a Protestant summer camp with my earthly best friend and her church was teaching us what Jesus can mean to us personally. The Bible was so powerful and intriguing I accepted Christ was who He said he was; the Savior. As life goes on, the story continues with more and more revelation of what the dream means. Eventually I'd understand where I the road I went wrong, why parts of it were scary and how to get there in meditation to learn more. I've learned to lean on the Spirit's guiding to seeing this road and evaluating my life on it. The first time I was assured this was all God's leading was when my dream became a real, live scene played on an altar during one Easter week. I was 19. A giant wooden cross stood in the center and the priest walked out clothed in dazzling white. I fell to my knees. Tears flooded my face. I returned to my best friend who I ignored in rebellous teen years at times. Countless times God would bring me back on this road in the last two decades showing me more and more evidence like this real experience. For me, spiritual life is deeply impacted by a childhood dream then practiced with a real world relationship. We saw things most kids never do. We had spiritual occurrences most people would classify me mentally insane if I told them. But they were real! And Jesus knew what would happen so He prepared me in advance to know Jesus would be my best friend to the end. These moments with Jesus give me hope, an everlasting eternal assurance of the One who holds my left hand and leads me to Heaven. This is what allows me to persevere in faith, to stay in a state of AWE, and to never let go of my friendship with the Lord .

So you say you want a king, huh?

You can spend the entire day reading all the text in the Bible about Old Testament kings; you can be intellectually wrapped up in how God is going to keep David's royal chosen line safe in this hot mess of people killing people and terrible punishment coming down from Heaven. Jealousy in rage. Nations torn apart and all the world can see this divided house perfectly aligned for a fall. Somehow David's line is spared the bloody sword, even when the two opposing sides of Israel intermarry and God sends one replacement outside the line to murder both kings. Studying the carnage laced text, you can wonder how it got so bad. It all comes down to one verse. The intro to the saga explains it all-they asked for it.Hungry and thirsty, they demand one way to feed their souls. Their starvation blinds them to make a choice based on what they see in front of them and how they feel. But the people refused to listen to Samuel. "No!" they said. "We want a king over us. Then we will be like all the other nations, with a king to lead us and to go out before us and fight our battles." 1Sam 8:19 Begging to be led in a way that will satisfy what they perceive is missing, the Israelites ask for a king. They see other people gaining much benefit from being led. Nations of people look strong and mighty with someone in power. This request comes from a people who believe God is sending them a mighty warrior to take out their oppressors and have them reigning in glory for eternity. They got it all wrong. Not much different than I did on the dating scene sometimes haha. Never compare your status to what or who you see around you and what other people have. Maybe that's why there are two commandments on coveting in Gods top 10 list of things to look out for. See Jesus was the leading man. But, He wasn't going to just come in blazing a trail of hurt for everyone who hurt me, pick up all the bills I can't afford to pay, raise my son so I'm not as stressed, heal all my families illnesses so everyone is well and spoil me till the end of my time. Nor was Jesus going to come this way to the Israelites. Jesus would come as a baby needing to be fed, burped, diaper changed and taught the ways of a proper Jewish servant. Dutiful and faithful to His earthly parents and Heavenly Father, He would be an "out-of the box" success story beaten right out of this world He created because they wouldn't get the eccentric demands of love He possessed and stressed everyone live by. Surely I felt the love Jesus offered. I knew who He was thanks to my loving parents. But in my teens I rebelled that love and never really got on track until I realized Jesus was my one true love. So in the meantime, I'd live like the Israelites in Judges doing my own thing and put kings in place of God to lead me.

Come out, Come out where ever you are

It’s so easy to recognize the pattern of whenever I ask for a chore to be fulfilled or homework to be done or the truth about a situation that happened at school, I’ll find my son locked in the bathroom. What a perfect picture of the “Fall” in all of us! What’s with the hiding? Can we be honest, be real? Our human nature has us doomed to repeat the retreat to the bushes and covering up in fig leaves. Did you know those leaves were poison to human skin? Makes a lot more sense how harmful hiding can be emotionally, spiritually and physically when you think of having an irritating rash in that location! There is actually a full lesson on underwear in the Bible. The purpose for the garment was for priests to be covered waist to knee before the “Holy of Holies” to present oneself reverently before the Lord. Strength was associated with the area covered in other Old Testament references. A belt of truth girds this area in the New Testament. According to online research, the only time the same word for undergarment in Exodus is used in Jesus’ day was when the Savior was stripped during His trial. T.D. Jakes explains the true exposure of humanity’s hero on Calvary as a victorious struggle. But humanity often finds a need to cover up the brutality. “Where did this loincloth come from? Why is it painted on most of the pictures I see of the cross? Isn’t that what hinders us now? Are we, the Body of Christ, hiding beneath a loincloth that has stifled our testimony and blocked our ability to be transparent, even with one another? There is seemingly some secret order whereby we have not been allowed to share our struggles as well as our successes. Our ministers are dying of loneliness because they feel obligated to maintain some false image of perfection in order to be serviceable in our society. We have no one to laugh with, no one to cry with, and no one who will sit down and share a sandwich with us. Beneath the loincloth of human expectation and excessive demands, many men and women are bleeding to death!” – T.D. Jakes’ Naked and not Ashamed My favorite author goes on to say religion is like a loincloth making a cover over what God meant to expose. The raw humanity and transparency in a person’s testimony always drew my attention to a sermon. Those are the speakers I want advice and mentoring from! Such honesty means genuine faith. Someone who is walking the talk or still stumbling through. I want to hear from more Davids who will tell you they lusted after that girl so much they killed her husband before they got on their knees and begged God to help them undo what they became. I want to hear from more Rahabs who bared themselves unashamed before many before realizing they were temples of a Holy Spirit worthy of keeping themselves presentable before a One, True, God. Tell me like it is because living as a Christian isn’t ever going to be easy and I wasn’t called to cover up anything or sugar coat my Bible. In a Beth Moore study on freedom, she talks about how Gideon was found threshing wheat in a wine press. Apparently wheat can't grow in a cave where he was hiding-it has to get out in the open air and let the breeze get to it. Breathe out that testimony, all its details and all your concerns. Breathe in the life giving Spirit. Think if it as Lamaze for God birthing something new from within you. Let it be delivered. Let it grow. But don't hide it in the bathroom for private reading hours only.

Mind blown

Despite popping out a baby from her womb, being a "milk truck" for six months and lack of sleep, this chic pushed through her physical fitness requirements. Fifteen years ago, she held her infant son tight while grinning ear to ear in her blue military uniform after leadership adorned it with gold bars. She earned the rank upon college graduation after a school year paused by labor and school days with intermittent breaks to cuddle a feeding hour. Her first duty was to pack up the family and move to flight school. The day in junior college year when her belly was too big for a flight suit was the missed warning sign God had other plans. Determined, she rolled with it, took the punches and got the opportunity to switch to public relations if she was willing to go to Oklahoma A "yes, sir" was her reply before she looked at the location on a map to fully understand. The family uprooted again. Within months they found themselves huddled in a second floor bathroom until the sound of a freight train passed. They stepped out on to the balcony of their aparment building where neighbors stared shockingly into the vast plains of rubble. Houses were gone but their lives were spared. Being on the ground with media, she learned how tragic it really is when you're looking for something or someone that could have blown to another location. Or perhaps something was blown into a location and people were trying to identify it. How someone pointed to a pile of wood and said "that's where shelter was," she will never understand. At least she discovered how to get the president through the war-torn looking area. Her self confident, resilient, pride-filled passion for life was welcome in a community of tornado prepared people. The stories of this week, on the 15th anniversary of becoming an officer in the military, she reflects back. Who was that girl? Oh the places we have been, fond memories we have, trials we overcame and bonds that are sealed! Wow what a mind trip! Peace be with Oklahoma and peace be within us all. God offers a safe haven in mercy's arms.Those hands will also take you on an amazing journey if you hold on and let Him lead. then one day you can look back 15 years and say "Wow, God is amazing.!"

Nothing but an earthworm

I had fun making this note on my Bible app on Mark 16:18 Among the great promises Jesus has for us upon receiving Holy Spirit is the ability to pick up serpents by hand.Finally, with soften hearts yieled to God, we receive correct vision and eye sight by the hearing the Holy Spirit. We are able to know the serpent is not a big threatening monster. He really does crawl on his belly. Grinding his wrigglely body like the Hell dwellers grind their teeth, he wries with determination to steal, kill and destroy but he has no power of his own. Though the enemy voice is loud and obnoxious, he's small and insignificant. Why he is nothing but an earthworm- doomed to this world, buried in it's dirt and nothing but a garden pest.So pick him up, see his small sliminess and tell him to get out of your garden growth in the name of Jesus. He can't hurt you; he is defeated. Scientists say all the spineless creature can do is turn up the soil but all this does is allow the nutrients to rise to the top. Let what is Christ in you rise to the top and hold that confidence high above any circumstances trying to up turn your Word-enriched soil.

Shut the door on that jealous fool

Then Satan entered Judas (Luke 22:3) If you picture Judas sitting at the Last Supper head spinning around spewing green goo all over Jesus and the 12, you let Hollywood paint your imagination. The enemy is crafty. He sneaks in. It's a slow fade. At dinner Judas sat along with the others asking "is it I, Lord?" They had to ask because it is likely Satan can enter any of us at any time and we may not even know it. I wish I hurled nasty all over the place and started growling so the moment would be obvious. Instead, I learned years later that jealous loser infiltrated my life. Maybe I left a door open and he entered. Maybe I shut a door on God and kept the enemy in. Maybe I missed an opportunity to evict the snake. There are numerous ways the devil entered. Unfortunately he wasn't wearing a bright red suit with light up horns and a tail so I'd recognize him in the dark room. Nor did he poke me with that pitchfork or douse me in fire. No he enters our mind. A Christian author and playwright, Rob Lacey, voice from his book "Word on the Street" performance on CD plays in my mind. "Your thinkings freed!" That's what active faith does! It clears out the garbage in our minds we've accepted from a liar, a thief and a murderer. The Bible helps us sift through what seems "natural" and a part of our nature as a human to tell us who we truly are as a creation of God. By talking with Jesus daily and allowing His Spirit to enter more and more we see a transformation in our perception. We don't know how it got there but we know it brings peace, joy and a value to our lives beyond understanding. It is far opposite side of deception that leaves us feeling ashamed, guilty, struggling and dirty. Is it I, Lord? And why? Please tell me so I can shut the door daily on that jerk.